using boundaries with an addict
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Read the previous entry here.

"Things get worse! 

Things get worse with an effective strategy.  It’s true.  

Expect conflict when you stop exhibiting the codependent behaviors of rescuing, persecuting, and suffering.  The addict’s behavior typically gets worse with the behaviors of self-love, unconditional-love and tough-love properly applied.  Family members and close friends will require time to adjust to the addict’s worsened behavior.  It takes both objectivity and courage to initiate effective strategies, knowing that the addict’s threats, yelling, and name calling will increase.  

But be assured that the increasing tension is a sign that you are changing and likely eliminating codependent behaviors.  If you are unable to withstand the increased conflict that comes with change, don’t plan a strategy.  Go back and work on self-love and find a support resource…"

Hold on to Hope pgs 154-155

What's your effective strategy?  

Mine include Detaching, Self-care, Boundaries, Support, Accountability, SpeakingLimbo and the Big Thaw.  

The Big Thaw isn't something I've talked a lot about yet.  I've just begun to feel myself melting and warming up to Mr. Scabs.  More later on that subject.

And I've certainly seen things get worse before they've gotten better.